Practice today was a total, but expected, regression. My legs were still sore and noodle-y from practice the day before so my skating super sucked. I just got tired so quickly that even after a few laps I was shaking.
It is expected that some days will just be down time days. I spent a lot of time sitting on the bench. Talking ref stuff. And trying to get back up.
I hate these days because I feel like a failure when I sit down. These are the days when just showing up is progress.
I'm tired of the "sucking" dialogue. I actually told my fellows refs we were no longer allowed to mention my sucking or progress. It's too easy for me to chatter myself into a hole. I need to just shut up and do.
So I did, as best I could. Which was not much. But I did it.
I stayed afterward for the open skate. My legs were feeling a little better and I had not honestly done much skating during practice.
I didn't stay long, but I pushed myself and kept going for another 45 minutes.
And while this doesn't seem like much. It's about 40 minutes longer than when I first started.